I’ve never felt any connection to one location. Each one of my “homes” has simply been a place where I laid my head to rest. The idea that you can enter some building and are overcome with a feeling of relief as you’re welcomed into your own home is something completely unfamiliar to me. I know this issue partially the stems from my difficulties facing my home life as a child, causing me to feel as though I’m only existing where I am temporarily. I have never settled down in the slightest or put my roots anywhere. I believe this is the reason why I am so distant from everyone in my life. To be constantly waiting for the time limit on my friendships to be up has robbed me of so many beautiful relationships with others. After writing it out, it definitely sounds like anyone with common sense would understand that that’s not how life and relationships work, which is true but we need to consider my mindset and all the experiences that have made it. Why would I chase after a connection with people who are only temporarily in my life? My relationships with others isn’t the main topic of this post though; I wanted to touch back on something I’ve previously discussed briefly in this post, which is what home means to me.
Month: November 2022
Becoming a Better Person to Myself
One of the things I’ve been meaning to get around to lately is cleaning up the posts that I currently have published on my blog. A lot of them contain countless literary and grammatical errors among other issues, but as I was going through and correctly my previous mistakes, I noticed something. I have already grown so much since I started this blog. I still feel a lot of the same things I’ve talked about in my older posts, but I’ve learned to deal with them in a more healthy way. In one post in particular, I went on a tangent about how I feel as though I lack creativity and intelligence, which is in no way true, though I could work on raising both skills. I’m not quite sure if skills is the correct word to use in that situation, but I’m not sure what word to put in its place. Regardless, if you live your life, putting down every single thing you do every day, then you are going to despise yourself. You have to show love and patience to yourself; the person that you should love the most is yourself. I think for a lot of people this concept of putting yourself before others has been ruined, because people have insisted that this way of thinking is selfish. I don’t believe that it’s selfish whatsoever though. You are the most important person in your life, that’s a fact. If you continue to put others in front of yourself, forgetting to even consider your needs and wants then you are riding backseat in your own life. No one can experience your life but you and hating yourself for everything that you do will rob you of every wonderful experience that you could have.
.˙· 𓆝.° ｡˚𓆛˚｡ °.𓆞.° ｡˚𓆝˚｡ °.𓆛.° ｡˚𓆞 .˙ 