It has been a short while since I have last written on here, even longer since Iβve last published something. I am currently at a point in my life where I feel like nothing I do holds enough worth to even bother to have it uploaded to my anonymous blog with no consistent readers. I feel extremely sad, and I have felt this sad for quite some time now, it has only just gotten to a point where I can no longer stay above water. Every day, there are new things that come into my life to bring me new reasons to feel worse about myself and the life that I live. I have tried a lot of things to try and distract myself from this, or try and do as much as to actually get professional help for the things that are causing this disconnect from the rest of the world. Nothing I do is enough though, unfortunately.
Tag: Blue
Sadder blog entries.
Nostalgia and Loneliness
I try my hardest to see things from an optimistic light so often, but at times like right now, I can’t help but succumb to the suffocating feeling of hopelessness. I’ve talked about this numerous times in my previous posts, but something I’ve struggled a lot with growing up, especially recently, is the feeling of utter loneliness that comes with growing up. The only thing I find hard to accept about this feeling is that I don’t think I’m to a point in my life where I should have to feel that yet. I believe that coming to terms with the idea that this truly is only your life and the only person in it that genuinely matters is yourself is something that is meant to be entertained only as you are way later in life than I am. I don’t know exactly when that point in anyone’s life is, but I am positive that it isn’t in your early 20s. Just typing that out is enough to make me realize that I should not have to be fully accustomed to the feeling of absolute loneliness. Now should be the time that I am making memories with people and finding out who I am, and I should have been doing this for years, but instead, I have months’ worth is time wasted and the time I have spent doing meaningful things adds up to no more than two weeks.
.ΛΒ· π.Β° ｑΛπΛｑ Β°.π.Β° ｑΛπΛｑ Β°.π.Β° ｑΛπ .Λ 